In my practice I have an exercise called “True/False Choice”. Most clients who struggle in life don’t know why and come to see me with lots of confusion and excuses for their poor health/achievements/result/success. More often than not they operate from “the quadrant” of “Deny, Avoidance or False CHOICES” and that for a very long time:
1- DENY CHOICE- IT DOES NOT PRODUCE RESULTS, PEOPLE LOSE
NOT PLAYING in the game of LIFE
• Perceives oneself as having no responsibility and therefore not to blame or at fault. Their perception is they never fail
• Acts like they don’t care (they can actually care a lot)
• Doesn’t have to feel anything (they can actually be quite sensitive) VICTIM of circumstances
• Not even running in the race
• Plays the wait and see game and still does not make a choice
• I’m right, no matter what!
• “I don’t want to” grow up - Don’t want to make a CHOICE
• What stops you is how you feel and what you think (YOUR PROGRAMS!)
2- AVOID CHOICE – DOES NOT PRODUCE RESULTS, PEOPLE LOSE
• JUST PLAYING
• Sees the choice but does not make it.
• If it goes good, I’ll stick with this choice, but if it goes bad, I’ll make a different choice
• Plays the wait and see game.. .a journalist…is on the sidelines of life Because they don’t make the choice, the choice gets made for them! ! Creates doubt and confusion
• Says, ” I want this” but settles for mediocrity
• WANTS TO BE RIGHT.. .defensive, righteous, excuses
• Reactive instead of proactive
• Victim
• More afraid of losing something/someone than taking the RISK
• Has POTENTIAL
• “Thinking” about growing up
3- FALSE CHOICE – PRODUCES RESULTS, PEOPLE WIN
• PLAYS NOT TO LOSE (does not want to fail or make a mistake) – Heavy price to pay to keep up with this: exhaustion/stress/poor health
• Does not choose for one’s self
• Choice is based on the expectations of others: society, family, authority, looking good, supposed to, have to, they made me, etc.
• Reactive instead of proactive
• Often feels used, victimized or feels like one has to or should
• Success is often achieved but is unfulfilling and exhausting affecting health
• “Is this important to me?”
• I am a leader, therefore I have to get it done and it is expected of me
• “Trying” to grow up
4- TRUE CHOICE – PRODUCES RESULTS, PEOPLE WIN
• PLAYS TO WIN
• Takes personal responsibility for one’s choices and accepts all consequences Uses change as an opportunity for growth
• Proactive -finds solutions -achieves goals and success
• Creates liberty
• Is a leader of self and others
• Has no judgment on how others play the game
• Not righteous, just is
• When it gets tough, blames no one and keeps going
• Is “grown up”
True choice is the only acceptable place and if you want to know the definition of True Choice That brings true results then I invite you to make a visit to my office – it is my work after all and I value it! REMEMBER It takes courage to have an OPEN AND HONEST view on what is NOT WORKING in your life, and you DON’T HAVE TO DO IT alone!